From schlake@mailhost.nmt.edu Sun Mar 3 15:08:43 1996 Received: from uvula.tcct.nmt.edu (uvula.tcct.nmt.edu [129.138.3.225]) by mailhost.nmt.edu (8.7.3/8.6.9) with ESMTP id PAA24877 for ; Sun, 3 Mar 1996 15:08:37 -0700 (MST) Received: (schlake@localhost) by uvula.tcct.nmt.edu (8.6.11/8.6.9) id PAA14372 for tcc-sysprog; Sun, 3 Mar 1996 15:10:10 -0700 Message-Id: <199603032210.PAA14372@uvula.tcct.nmt.edu> From: schlake@mailhost.nmt.edu (Schlake ( William Colburn )) Date: Sun, 3 Mar 1996 15:10:10 -0700 X-phone: 505-835-2367 (home) 505-835-5748 (work) X-Organization: The School of Mines in Socorro New Mexico (New Mexico Institute of Mining and Technology) X-LatLong: 34 degrees, 03 minutes, 30 seconds N, 106 degrees, 53 minutes, 27 seconds W reply-to: schlake@mailhost.nmt.edu X-URL: http://www.nmt.edu/~schlake/ X-Mailer: Mail User's Shell (7.2.5 10/14/92) To: tcc-sysprog@mailhost.nmt.edu Status: ORr The Schlake Test Version 1.0.0.0.0.2/3 comma III Section 1. Are you Schlake? 2. Do you know Schlake? 3. Do you know someone who knows Schlake? 4. Do you know someone who does not know Schlake? 5. Do you know what Schlake means? 6. Can you spell Schlake correctly? 7. Do you know who Schlake is? 8. Do you know what Schlake's favorite bodily function is? 9. Have you ever been Schlake in a previous life? 10. Did you meet Schlake in a previous life? 11. ... Did you take pictures? 12. ... Nude? 13. Have you ever slept with Schlake? 14. ... Were you injured? 15. ... Did you require psychiatric care? 16. Is Schlake on drugs? 17. ... Should he be? 18. Is being with Schlake better than drugs? 19. Have you ever taken drugs and been with Schlake? 20. Have you ever tipped a light post with Schlake? 21. Do you play in a sandbox? 22. ... Do you play fair? 23. ... Do you hit people? 24. Do you make strange faces? 25. Do you always wash your hands before you pee? 26. ... Do you flush? 27. ... Twice? 28. Do you hold someones hand when you cross the street? 29. Do you hold your own hand when you cross the street? 30. Do you always cross in the crosswalk except on alternate Tuesdays? 31. ... Bilateral Wednesdays? 32. Have you ever stolen peices of paper off someones wall? 33. Are you Napolean? 34. Are you the center of the universe? 35. Are you the center of a bananna? 36. Have you ever slept with a bananna? 37. Have you ever played more than the square root of 121 role playing games? 38. Has Schlake ever given you a teddy bear? 39. Did he shoot it with a 7.62mm rifle? 40. Has Schlake ever worn your underwear on his head? 41. Has Schlake ever hit you with a plastic baseball bat? 42. Have you ever chased Schlake with an axe? 43. Have you ever been in Schlake's room? 44. Was it traumatic? 45. Have you ever stolen something with Schlake? 46. Are you reptile? 47. Do you believe the Earth is a snake? 48. Is there fuzz on your tongue? 49. Has Schlake ever duct-taped you? 50. ... Do you know why? 51. Do you know Schlake's favorite holiday? 52. Are you confused? 53. ... Are you sure? 54. Do you know what Brad said at 5:25 am 17 Nov 1989? 55. ... Do you think Schlake knows? 56. Have you ever played bouncy? 57. ... Was it by choice? 58. ... Were you injured? 59. Have you? 60. ... Are you sure? 61. ... Would you swear to that? 62. Are you a pygmy? 63. Can you breath in stereo? 64. Are you over the legal age of consent in Alaska? 65. Does Schlake play with your toys? 66. Does Schlake play with your? 67. Are you still anatomically correct? 68. Has Schlake ever saved something of yours? 69. Have you ever knelt on the ground and worshipped Schlake? 70. Has Schlake ever worshipped you? 71. Has Schlake ever put you in a giant green bag? 72. ... Did you want to be? 73. Has Schlake ever painted your car windows green? 74. Has Schlake ever painted you green? 75. ... Were you willing? 76. Do you smile a lot? 77. Have you ever had your underwear pulled up to your shoulders? 78. Do you think Schlake is strange? 79. ... Very Strange? 80. Did you forget? 81. Have you ever wargamed with Schlake? 82. Have you ever pillow fought with Schlake? 83. Would the world be a better place with Schlake? 84. Do you think Schlake should be castrated? 85. Have you ever molested Eric Heatwole? 86. Will you help Schlake molest Eric Heatwole? 87. Are you green? 88. Have you ever answered yet to question 433 of the Purity Test (500q)? 89. ... Did you have to look up question 433? 90. Does this test arouse you? 91. Are you blonde? 92. ... Is all of you blonde? 93. ... Did it hurt dyeing all of your hair blonde? 94. Do you know what Brian Sullivan's natural hair color is? 95. Are you proud? 96. Have you ever held a lighter to Noah Butlers crotch? 97. Do you care whether people use their hand? 98. Do you spin dinosaurs on a noose? 99. Can you count? 100. Are you the endproduct of an orgasmic secretion?