Instructions for Use:

This is a fairly long test consisting of five hundred questions. It starts out tame and gets progressively worse (or better, depending on your viewpoint). There are many ways of going about taking this test. You can, of course, as your right, guaranteed by the Constitution, be anti-social and sequester yourself in your room and take this test all by yourself; however, we feel that the funnest way to utilize this test is to hold a Purity Test Party. All you need is one copy of the test, and a bunch of friends. (Lots of writing implements and paper would be useful too.) The person with the copy of the test is the test administrator; s/he readsd the questions out loud and everybody else writes down their answers. We have no definite rules as to whether the participants are required to divulge their answers; that is up to the group to decide. However, each person's purity score should be made common knowledge. (The person with the highest score gets to be giggled at for the rest of his/her life.) This works great at parties and lets everybody know who's easy and who isn't, so you'll know who to go home with. Don't leave home without it.


All questions in this test pertain to events that have happened to you subsequent to your weaning and babyhood/infancy. Anything that may have happened before that time is considered not standing and void.

The term mutual masturbation refers to someone masturbating you AND/OR you masturbating someone else, not exclusively both at the same time.

We would also like to define having sex in the homosexual case; homosexual sex has occurred when both partners are of the same sex and one of the partners has an orgasm while there is some contact between the genitals of both partners.

We would now like to bring to your attention that there is no passing nor failing score. Therefore, one really shouldn't worry too much about getting a high score... even if you do get giggled at for the rest of your life.


K. Scott Rowe